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Theresa Walsh Giarrusso

Do women represent women better/worse in divorce?

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I have a friend getting divorced, and it is very interesting how the advice of her legal counsel differs based on whether she is talking to the man on the team versus a woman.

The man is a senior partner and she only deals with him sometimes because he is extremely expensive. She is a stay-at-home mom with multiple small children. He originally told her not to find a job and not to move in with her family. He is trying to demonstrate that the husband needs to pay the child support and take care of his family.

However, whenever my friend ends up talking to the woman on the team — not a partner who married but no kids — she is badgered that she needs to find a job and should move into her own apartment and not stay in the house.

My friend feels like the woman lawyer, who is obviously working, is judging her for being a stay-at-home mother, and that her advice will not necessary ensure a better settlement but is her own personal bent.

Also I find interesting how the sex of the mediator plays into things. The husband specifically didn’t want a woman meditator because he was under the impression the woman would side with his wife more readily. However, the male mediator was rather harsh to the husband basically telling him to get his stuff together and support his family.

What has your experience been with female lawyers versus male lawyers? Did you find that their advice differed based on their sex? What about judges and mediators? Do men mediator/judges tend to judge deadbeat dads more harshly than a woman? Or do you think a woman would be more ready to side and support a “sister?” Which sex would you choose to represent you? Which sex would you want as a mediator or judge? 

 

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